“Didn’t you know?” asks Pete. “We’re christening the new ground on Wednesday. 6 o’clock. Bring a rake”. Wow - an historic event – and a poke in the eye for all the doubters. How will the wicket play? What will the outfield be like? Will Royalty be there to cut the ribbon or break the champagne bottle? These and doubtless other questions are on everyone’s lips, I suspect. When I arrive at the ground, it is buzzing. People are changing, glugging beer, taking photos. A few take off to inspect the wicket, and some tapping and prodding goes on (no insertion of keys, thankfully). It looks well-baked, well-shaven and hard. A pitch for chasing runs on, I fancy…….

Phil is organizing teams: he has a Little Red Book into which he writes names and then asks Cook Junior to select the batting order. This may explain why, in a 20-20 match, the big hitters are well down the order. Phil (naturally) takes first strike; Pete (naturally) opens the bowling from the top end. There is a deep collective release of breath from players and spectators alike as Phil leaves the first ball going outside the off stump. The bounce is sound, the carry a shade low. On the stumps, the bounce is firmer. Phil plays the first over with deep respect, and Head defends the second – from Dave H – with equal care.

Of course it should be Phil who strokes the first boundary – off Pete, through the covers – and it is. The crowd gasps as the ball races across the outfield which has been shorn to a barber’s no. 1 by Pete & his trusty tractor. I begin to think we shall see a lot of 4s tonight. Now Dave slants one across Phil who nicks it to slip. Tim pouches it effortlessly. “Nothing wrong with the pitch – I just played a bad shot”, pronounces Phil loyally. Head then plays all round - he confesses it - a straight one from Pete. Nigel also goes without much fuss and it is left to Gazza & Muzza to stop the rot. All is going well until there is a slight mix-up over a call, resulting in that rare phenomenon which is described later as “synchronized running” – where both batsmen are running in the same direction. Eventually someone has to go, and Gary returns looking somewhat bemused; when Murray apologizes to him later he sounds equally bewildered!

When Els follows, shortly after, for a single, Phil’s team is in trouble at 35 for 5, with overs running out fast. Muzza defiantly hits 3 boundaries in an over off the unfortunate Mickey. Hughes bashes a couple over mid-on but is then undone by Pete’s Cunning Plan (place a fielder at deep-mid-on, silly), John running back 40 yards (he says) to take the catch. This lets in Duds ahead of Burnie, busy collecting wads of money off the unsuspecting crowd for his Benefit Year. Murray declines to push on to 30 and an automatic spot in the 1st XI, and instead is run out by a remarkable direct throw from Pete W (as far as is known, no money changes hands between Gary & Pete W.). Then, in the mayhem that is 20-20, Duds is run out in the same over from John, and returns just a trifle disappointed with his partner’s call. Burnie in mitigation hits the first 6 on the ground, a lovely chip over mid-wicket, Macca flays a couple over mid-off, and suddenly the 20 overs are up. 108 seems a little shy of a winning total…………..

How shy is revealed fairly quickly as Tim & Grouty start to flay the ball to all parts right from the first over. Anything full is driven, Grouty preferring the straight route while Tim mainly favours the covers. Within about 7 overs they have raised 50, and the wicket looks better and better. Anything that goes past what passes for our inner ring does not need chasing. Grouty is first to retire after a very classy innings; Tim, more brutal, follows almost straightaway. Duds, Andy Mac, Head and Burnie are all fairly savaged, with only Muzza restraining.

Ollie continues the slaughter, but now there is a slight blip in the innings as Phil’s XI snaffle a wicket! John is lured down the ground by a flighted one from Christian, Adam completing the catch. 87 for 1! Blackers smites a couple of boundaries, announces “I’m going to beat Ollie to 30” and is promptly bowled by the persistent Christian (at least I think that’s how his Dad describes him). Finally, with Ollie only 2 away from retirement (in runs, not years, I add hastily), he fails to get fully to the pitch of a Hughes pie and lofts a towering catch to the ever-reliable Head. I presume Head reckons to impress the 1st XI skipper more by taking the catch rather than fluffing it and allowing Ollie to reach his 30. Sam scores the winning runs and then keeps Phil’s XI out for naughty-boy fielding practice, during which the first Lost Ball is achieved (if you can call it an achievement). The sun sinks very low; it is well past 9 when Sam finally lets us off at the 20th over, and the celebrations begin……..a grand evening, a tribute to all the hard work, and a dream finally come true!!